Omgosh guys, i feel like I got hit by a double decker bus! I've finally hit my two days off and they couldn't be more well deserved at this point. I just finished a 7 day stretch, 6 of which were midnights, battling the cold from hell I might add. Yesterday after work, I was able to sleep less than three hours before I almost missed my Irish tax number appointment which would have royally screwed me, and then I was able to get another 2 later in the day before midnights again last night. This turmoil preceded today's checking out which ultimately meant I could not sleep, I left my keys at work and had to rush back and back to the hostel again with 45 minutes to spare. I slipped in a quick shower, rushed to pack, and headed out for 7 hours of debauchery to pass the time before I could check in again to my new room all the while lugging around my laptop on my tired, weathered back. I'm physically devastated at this point.
Tonight I'll be heading out to a viewing for a room that I'm pretty certain I'll take regardless of what it looks like because I need a room to myself. I'm so over living out of suitcases, sharing bathrooms with 20 other dudes, and trying to sleep when everyone else is waking up. This has been a seriously stressful and draining week, BUT, it hasn't stopped now has it? The point is, this experience is definitely making me stronger because there's been moments where I thought I didn't want to endure this anymore. Today being the lead example, I haven't slept in literally a day and I don't intend to sleep away one of my days off. Essentially, I'll be up all damned day and night and that's just the way it is. I truly hope this place works out for me, I miss cooking. I miss writing recipes and testing new ideas in the kitchen. I especially miss grocery shopping lol Loserish I know but man, I love grocery shopping, it's where the inspiration begins! I just miss home cooked food as opposed to eating out. Since I've been trying to cheap out until I start getting paid, I've been eating 3 euro sandwiches and the occasional fruit cup, I'm over it. I needed to rant y'all, that's it for today! Expect lots of new recipes soon if I get this place <3 HAPPY VEG
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This has probably been one of the hardest weeks of my life. I started my midnights position at the hostel which has been going super well. Both of the midnight guys are super friendly and helpful, it's a great atmosphere. I'm still struggling to get into the midnights groove though, I worked midnights back home for about 2 months and ended up quitting my job because it was wreaking havoc on my body. I'm going to stick it out though because the other option is returning home to Canada with my tail between my legs lol That just won't do.
This might all be compounded by the fact that I feel like I have the plague. This cold / flu has literally destroyed me guys. I wake up feeling ok and within an hour or so, it starts to get worse and worse until I feel compelled to contact the morgue and let them know I'll likely be arriving later in the day. I finally picked up some medication at the pharmacy today so here's to hoping I start feeling less like I'm going to die soon because I tell you, this whole midnights transition has likely been especially difficult because of this horrid illness. It's debilitating being sick and being up all night I tell you. In other news, I contacted the vegetarian Society of Ireland again and offered my services to them. I'd love to contribute to their page and try and revitalize it. I've noticed they are lacking updates and from what I've been told, they are lacking volunteers as well. it would be nice to lend my expertise to them and maybe leave my mark on the vegetarians of this country lol Any way I can help and perhaps get things going again for them would be wonderful! I'll be attending World vegetarian Day this weekend which I'm super excited about, so hopefully I can meet some like minded people there. I still have no bank account which is kind of frightening as I get paid next week. I would love to be more diligent but I'm sick as a dog and need to sleep. By the time I wake up, the banks are either closed or closing so soon I won't make it on time. I've made appointments with two different ones and haven't heard anything back yet. I need a bank account and I need it quickly. Other than that, I'm loving Dublin so far. The people all seem to be super friendly and I've not once felt unsafe. That's huge when you consider living in a larger city, safety is a big thing right? HAPPY VEG I'm feeling a bit anxious about starting the new job tomorrow. Surprisingly, I'm not really nervous, I'm more just ready to get the ball rolling here. It will be so great to have a reason to get up and do something every day, plus, it will keep me from spending as I'm often tempted to do. I come from a past that includes a big shopping problem as well as a problem with the management of money. I got the help I needed and can now keep from overdoing it, but boy oh boy it's tempting to stop in places and peruse. I won't even allow myself to window shop for fear that it will lead to uncontrolled spending, sad eh?
I'm also anxious to get into a place and start cooking again. It's been great eating out here or there but even that I've cut out in the last few days. I allow myself a latte or two throughout the day, and a cheap sandwich from the local mart, aside from that, I'm trying to avoid overspending on food. I've noticed a few extra pounds hanging out around my midsection so it's probably for the best that I scale back on the eating out. I started responding to places today. I tell yah, it's fairly nerve wracking trying to find the right place for the right price. Ideally, I'd like to spend less than 600 euros each month which is totally achievable, it's just the location that has me a bit fried. I really want to live within walking distance OR short bus ride but some of the places that fall within my price range are in completely different parts of Dublin altogether. I expect to be living with 3 or 4 people as that's what the people do here because of sky high rental costs which is fine, more people to eat my food and give me opinions and feedback :) I found a few that are close to where I'd like to be so here's to hoping I hear from one of them in the next few days. It's all a waiting game now y'all. HAPPY VEG Boy howdy is there ever a lot of things one has to accomplish just to live and work overseas. I feel great about everything I've accomplished to date but believe me when I say, there's so much more that I have to do before I'm actually settled.
Now that I have a job which I am super excited about, I have to get a few more things done before I can even begin to be paid. I have an appointment to get a PPS number which will allow me to be paid (basically it's a tax number) which after I receive that, I then have to go to a bank and pray that they will issue me a bank account. From what I hear, the Irish bank account process can be quite difficult. I've basically been told that if one rejects you, go right down to the next one and try there. Ultimately, there's plenty of hoops you have to jump through to get the ball rolling. I'm prepared to do whatever it takes but it certainly makes me wonder, why is it so easy to apply for this visa and come here but everything you have to do once here is so bloody difficult? Seems odd that the first part is super simple and everything that follows is basically torture. Aside from that, I'm super excited to start my job this Friday. I'll be doing training during the day before heading right into midnight's Saturday and Sunday which I've been told are the two busiest days of the week at this hostel. I'm obviously ready but admittedly a bit nervous as well because I really don't know what I'm up against. Whatever the case, I'm super ready to just hit the ground running and kill it. Who knows what opportunities will come from this right? I might hate midnight's, but if it leads to opportunities that are on other shifts, I can handle it for a few months. Nothing else is really new with me. I'm starting to look at places today which I've also heard can be hell on earth. I honestly don't care where I stay or what it looks like so long as I have a roof over my head and can afford to live lol I'll check back in in a few days with an update! HAPPY VEG These last 5 or so days have really been exceptional in Dublin. Not just because of the city, the travelling, or the beauty, but because I've accomplished more this time in 4 days than I did in nearly 2 weeks the last time I was here. I've activated my phone, fixed my GNIB card mixup, had an interview that led to an interview for a position I know I can take on, and navigated the city. I'm so very proud of myself. I tell you, being an introverted extrovert has its ups and downs. I've managed to initiate convos with some of my hostel roomies, although I'd prefer they started the convo lol I've also come to realize that I absolutely love this time to just be me, understand what I want and need, and also test myself. It's something that I've needed for a long time and I truly hope this helps break me out of whatever remaining shell I'm still entangled in.
What I CAN say however is that I miss my family terribly. I miss my friends of course as well but I've bonded so well with my family, especially since my mother's passing, that it's hard to fathom not seeing them for so long. I know a year really isn't that long, but it is when you love your family as much as I do. I know I'll get over it, and we talk almost every day, but it is definitely the hardest part of this process. Of course I want to live and experience, but I want my family just a touch closer lol Guess you can't have it all. I had an interview today with a recruiter who was probably the coolest and most badass lady I've ever meant. I don't know how many times she said fuck, but it certainly made for a casual interview that helped release any nerves I may have had. I felt so comfortable and welcomed, she was really kick ass. Now I wait to interview tomorrow for a position in a hostel that I know I can take on. I'm looking forward to the interview and hopefully securing a job through it. It's super daunting knowing that money is limited and everything kind of depends on a job. Obviously, life depends on money, but this for me means staying or going. After last year's debacle, the last thing I want to do is return home defeated. That's why I MUST find work and make this happen. Ugh, what else is there to say? I'm still super bummed about my brother and his girlfriend basically cutting me out of their lives. If only they knew how much I cared for my nephews, and my brother. As far as she goes, I could care less about her. She never tried to be a part of our family from the day we met her, I don't care about her. I care about losing my brother, and my beautiful nephews. I worked so hard last year to be able to come back to Ireland, it just stings to hear things like I don't care, or I didn't call enough. While she sits at home all day, I'm working 16 hours to make my dreams come true...and she held that against me. I'll never forgive her for that. Enough with the negativity though. I think I need a drink lol I'm out. As I approach my leave date on Monday, I've come into a time of reflection. This past year has been a bit of a blur but I've had the opportunity to learn some new things, strengthen relationships, and learn more about myself. Starting with the biggest and most important lesson I learned, to accept failure and use it as motivation to move forward.
Coming home so soon after I left for Ireland last year really crushed my spirits. Mismanagement and lack of preparation left me in a rather undesirable position and my only option was to come home. Although this originally destroyed me, I learned a lot from it as well. Coming home, I knew I'd return the following year so I knew I had to learn from my mistakes and make sure this time around went so much better. Failure is an unfortunate part of trying new things and it can really dampen your spirits, but it's important to look at the failure as an opportunity to improve and a reason to still be proud. You tried something! That's a big deal! I couldn't be more proud of myself for leaping into something so drastically different than anything I'd ever done. Until then, I'd never flown let alone visited a country overseas. Despite the failure of coming home early, there were so many things I succeeded at that I couldn't allow myself to be dragged down. I learned about resilience and determination. I knew I was going back and I knew I'd have to work harder and save more to make this happen. I went back full swing into both of my jobs and worked my tail off this year to get ahead and save enough money to make this opportunity happen. It wasn't easy asking for my jobs back, but I was so grateful that both of my bosses welcomed me back. Without them, I couldn't have ended up in the position I am in now. I am so grateful to them but also super proud of myself. I left a good enough impression on them that they welcomed me back without pause. That meant a lot to me for sure. Nothing like feeling like an asset to a company! I also realized this year how important relationships are. I did a rather terrible job of making and sticking to plans with my closest friends and I now realize that no amount of work should come between relationships. I recently had a falling out with my brother and his family and it kills me every minute of the day that I'm losing out on my nephews. With that being said, I know how hard I fought for that relationship so I refuse to allow myself to feel sorry about it. When I return, I'm definitely going to work harder to maintain the relationships that I still have. Attend more of the social functions, visit unannounced, and just try to be present more often. I know they know I was busy because I was trying to go back to Ireland and really enjoy the experience, but it still stung that I was so unavailable. Lastly, I think I learned just how strong I am. I can truly achieve anything if I put my mind to it and that's exactly why I'm heading back to Ireland on Monday. I'm getting a 2nd chance because I fought for it, I worked hard for it, and I should be especially proud of that. Working one full time job is hard, but adding in a part time job as well was so much effort, but well worth it in the end. Here I am, moving back to Ireland in 3 days, and I think I'm actually ready this time. :) HAPPY VEG It's amazing how exhausting having a social life can be. I mean, don't get me wrong, I thoroughly enjoy all of my friends and spending time with them, and I enjoy social activities, but I sometimes feel overwhelmed when I'm booked for three or four days in a row. I suppose being an introverted extrovert is to blame. I really love going out and having fun but I also feel like I need to have some me time in between otherwise I start to feel overwhelmed.
With that being said, I'm looking forward to my last big group hangout with my healthy mama girls! I imagine I'm going to spend most of my night laughing, drinking, and hopefully not blacking out :p Last night, I went out to dinner at my favourite Greek restaurant with two of my fav girls from Tim Hortons and had an amazing time. It was nice to kind of say goodbye under pleasant circumstances, rather than just at work. After today, I've got a couple more hangouts I need to get in and then I'm pretty much on a plane to Dublin. What once seemed so far away has now crept up on me ever so quickly and I couldn't be more ready to go. I'm especially happy to get away from these 90 fahrenheit days, I've seen too many of them lately and considering sweating is in my top 3 least fav things, it's time for me to gtfo of here! Unlike last time, I'm not going to do a lot of crying. I know I'll stay in touch with all of my friends and family (those that want to stay in touch that is) and I know a year seems long, but truly isn't. When it's time for me to come back, it's going to feel like it flew by. I know the last time around felt like time passed quickly, mostly because everything as so new. All I know is that I'm so very ready to get back to Dublin. I'm ready to do all of the things I missed out on the last year and I'm ready to succeed. HAPPY VEG |
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